Hell joe_daddy, that is a beautiful model, nice one.

As for the questions:
The modders Bible is still around, if you search the sight there should be a link here somewhere.
Some of the modellers here do use Blender, again if you look around there are areas here where help can be asked for each type of program in use.
The third is more difficult, many folks are busy with their own particular projects and prefer not to be contacted through their PM, however, many are
quite willing to help out where you have issues, best to post your questions in the relevant areas of the forum, please be aware though you might not
get a quick answer as it depends on what you ask and whether there is a adequate answer..
The question about 3ds max is awkward, I myself have searched around to find old versions for sale but every one ended in dead ends and broken links as the program now is only available for rent, however, there are the tools around so you can use Blender, gmax and 3ds but I do not know of the availability for newer iterations of those programs.
Try this link as a start just to get you going, after that try the SuperSchool for more specialised stuff on java and many other things:
https://www.sas1946.com/main/index.php/board,65.0.htmlThere is a lot of information here and at at least three other IL-2 1946 modding sites, one is Russian so it is difficult to direct you anywhere
in particular without knowing just what you need, best is to look around and ask questions in areas where you see stuff that might help.
Most of us have been here years and still have difficulty, especially finding again threads we have already used.

Take care and be safe.
Wishing you all the very best, Pete.
